The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Come see our sink grown plant.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
