Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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