Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Randomize
