He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
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