You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize
