Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
