do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Randomize
