Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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