i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
