I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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