She is in my trunk
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize