Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
Your tits are I can't wait for
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
