i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
sarcasm needs its own font
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Randomize
