I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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