am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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