White coat. Heels.
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
this will be a night to untag.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
