And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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