Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Can you bring me the toilet please
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
