Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
