You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
