Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
Randomize
