gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
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