OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
