oh god the rape fog is back!
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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