Are we in a gay sports bar?
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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