Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Randomize
