the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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