I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Randomize
