I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
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