maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
