CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
Randomize
