I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
