I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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