I wannas sexs uuuuu
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize