Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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