i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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