that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
