Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
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