i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize