would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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