when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Randomize