'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
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