So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
