I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Who died my cat blue again?
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
God, I missed his penis.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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