just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Randomize
