At least make sure they are 18
Why
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
