Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
MIDGETS
????
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
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