Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
And then my night got REAL pukey
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
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