If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Randomize
