i'm signing you up for texting rehab
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Randomize
