I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize