the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
Every concussion has its silver lining
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Randomize
